


Election Editorials

by jbluphin



Category: Welcome to Night Vale
Genre: Author Commentary, Gen, Inspired by Welcome to Night Vale, Newspapers, POV Outsider, Welcome to Night Vale News Program Format, editorial
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2013-10-29
Updated: 2013-10-29
Packaged: 2017-12-30 21:09:44
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings, No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 540
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/1023412
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/jbluphin/pseuds/jbluphin
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>An editorial posted in the Night Vale Daily Journal prior to the 2014 Mayoral election in Night Vale.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Election Editorials

The hot topic in Night Vale this week is the upcoming mayoral election, where, after the withdrawal of Mayor Pamela Winchell, two newcomers to the political scene have entered the race.

First to enter the race was Hiram McDaniels, who posted his interest in joining the race on his blog this past December. McDaniels has some problems in his past - he was arrested for insurance fraud, falsifying identification fraud, evading arrest, and assaulting a police vehicle with fire. It is also worth stating that he has come under some criticism for his very nature: he is literally a five-headed dragon. However, despite some of the negative stereotypes for multi-headed beings, and general dragon-bashing, he has taken this fact and tried to turn it into a positive, using it as his campaign slogan: " _I’m literally a five-headed dragon. Who cares!"_  McDaniels has a reputation for his intelligence, new ideas, and focus on youth development - both in business and physical activity. He has also expressed interest in expanding local park systems. His opposition, however, has pointed to his exchanges with corn lobbyists with concern, in fear they may try to move in on the local imaginary corn market.

Less is known about the other mayoral candidate, the Faceless Old Woman Who Secretly Lives in Your Home, who announced her candidacy this past July. While McDaniel's description is well known and circulated (a five headed dragon,18 feet tall, weighing about 3600 lbs, and with red, black, green, and yellow eyes - mostly green), the Faceless Old Woman Who Secretly Lives in Your Home tends to be always just out of your sight. However, she is regularly in touch with the media and, like McDaniels, has an active online presence, based on her internet browsing history found on your computer cache, and her requests for your wifi password. Her stated positions include some innovative new ideas for increasing school funding while still lowering taxes, as well as for simplifying the political system which she believes has become too complicated. It is also rumored that she holds critical information that the Vague, Yet Menacing, Government Agency is eager to get hold of. This information may or may not be about you.

As an editorial, at the moment I find myself leaning towards Hiram McDaniels, since I feel I know more about his policies. And, while I try not to lean on stereotypes, I can't help but feel that being a five-headed dragon may give him a unique advantage for generating new ideas which may benefit Night Vale and a fresh perspective. However, I am not yet ready to endorse him in full - he is, in some ways, the more conservative candidate - and I would like to know more of the ideas from Faceless Old Woman Who Secretly Lives in Your Home. There is something to be said for being in touch with the voting base, and based on her residency, she is certainly more familiar with the day to day goings on in Night Vale than her opposition, who clearly originates from somewhere other than our little world. 

 I am looking forwards to the rumored debate which may (or may not) occur this coming Friday, which I plan on listening to with an open mind.


End file.
